Shopping spree

I know I’ve been talking a lot about the state budget and education lately, and today is no different. Except that, today, I’m happy! A walking-on-sunshine, happy-happens, don’t-worry-be-happy kind of happy!

Why are you so flippin’ happy, Aaryn? you ask. Well, I’ll tell you. I’m over the moon and two stars to the left because the state budget passed last week and with it comes a savings of roughly $260 a year! Can you stand it? It’s a veritable coup.

Now, before you go and get all jealous because it seems like I have all the luck, let me point out that—as the Sacramento Bee put it on June 30: “Your wallets will start feeling a little heavier tomorrow.”

Yes, it’s not just me who’s feeling the relief. Taxpayers from the coastal region to the inland valley and all up and down this bountiful, pot-hole-ridden Golden State are going to enjoy the bounty of an extra $260. Hooray for expiring taxes! I’m so giddy, I almost want to start a Thank-A-Republican campaign. For the moment, they’re busy thanking themselves, and, really, can we blame them? After all, they put in many hours of diligent work that paid off in a most lucrative manner.

“This is a great day for California,” said Assemblymember Tim Donnelly, a Republican from Twin Peaks. “The death of these taxes is the rebirth of our economy.” Yes, yes. It’s the afterbirth of our economy! Huzzah!

Since they’ve got the atta-boys covered, I’m spending energy on deciding how I’m going to spend my newfound wealth. Already, I’ve spent hours cloud-busting in the backyard, daydreaming in the grass about how to spend my extra money. This is time well spent, because the longer I put off my shopping spree, the more interest I can earn on that saved $260. And, too, I don’t want to be hasty or waste my money on impulse buys. This isn’t a $26.6-billion boon and I can’t just go off willy-nilly.

But here are a few of my first thoughts on spending all this glorious cash:

Groceries. This will keep my family of three fed for one week.

Oh, screw that.

This $260 could be a shopping extravaganza at Anthropologie. With my estimated savings, I should be able to get a rusted birdcage. Or a flowery caftan a la Mrs. Roper that will be out of style by September. Or a scarf made to look distressed by the blades of a ceiling fan. If only more state taxes had been vaporized, I could afford all three plus the vacant look to go with the ensemble.

But this isn’t only about me. I have a child to think about.

So, instead, I could get the 8G iPod Touch. This will come in handy during the many days my kid isn’t at school in the coming year(s), given the dwindling number of educational days. And the value of the iPod Touch as a solid college preparatory instrument cannot be overstated. I can set the girl in a corner with “Angry Birds” (teaches her physics) and not be disturbed while I follow grown women fighting on Twitter. Priced at $229, the iPod Touch would leave me a little extra cash to donate to Every Mother Counts (everymothercounts.com), firmly pitching my tent in Camp @dooce.

Jeez. I guess if I’m going to make donations, I should send this money to the San Diego Unified School District school-supplies fund. I like school supplies. And while they may seem like indispensable things, toilet paper and hand towels actually do have their place in a public school. Anyway, I did vote yes on Prop. J, so this would be a money-where-my-mouth-is kind of thing.

Then again, while the school-supplies fund is appealing, I think I’d just as well pony up to the nonprofit arm of my kid’s school. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line and all that. As much as I care about broader global issues and the status of education in this city specifically, my money is needed uber-locally. If I don’t fund my child’s public education, who will?

Of course, with summer comes lots of unoccupied time for the kids. Not to worry: The generous Republicans in our Legislature have provided me the option of one week of tennis camp for my daughter at the barnes Tennis Center in Point Loma. Camp is from 9:30 to 12:30, so I’ll need to hire a sitter to watch her in the afternoons while I’m at work. But! At a price of $199, the cost of camp will leave me just enough money to cover one afternoon. I’ll deal with the other four days when I get there.

Speaking of babysitters, I’m going to need one if the school year is shortened by seven days. At $10 per hour, I’ll be able to cover three of those days. Thank you, trickle-down-economicers, for making child care for my family possible. Do you mind weighing in on whether I should use sick or vacation time away from work so I can care for my kid the other four?

Oh, forget all this. I can put the money toward a Friday-through-Sunday subscription to The New York Times, thereby entering into a very methodical and slow, if intellectually stimulating, suicide. Because the news all around is just that depressing.

Tell me what are you going to do with your $260 savings by writing to aaryn@sdcitybeat.com and editor@sdcitybeat.com.