Nicholas Andre Dance Company
Toni Atkins - Photo by David Rolland
Whispering out loud
You have to give it to San Diego’s gay leaders: They’re masters of innuendo, whether sexual or political.
Take, for example, City Councilmember Carl DeMaio. Told that he must stick to a strict time limit, he announced to the crowd: “Every night when I get home, Johnathan gives me the same rule: Two minutes.”
The audience tittered.
“Two minutes to talk politics!” DeMaio cried out, then tsk-tsked the audience for their dirty minds.
It wasn’t the smoothest joke, but it certainly felt liberating. While gay politicians might not be free to marry (DeMaio’s put a promise ring on the finger of Johnathan Hale, publisher of the San Diego Gay & Lesbian News, the event’s sponsor), they are freer than their straight counterparts to wink and nudge. They also have greater liberty to break from party ranks.
Now, while DeMaio didn’t actually violate Ronald Reagan’s 11th Commandment (“Thou shalt not speak ill of any fellow Republican”), he certainly intimated illness towards one particular Republican with whom his district overlaps. And DeMaio did not tsk-tsk the audience when it hissed biliously at the mention.
“Please suspend your disbelief and recognize that even in Duncan Hunter’s own congressional district you can have an openly gay leader,” DeMaio said of Hunter, who vocally opposes allowing gays to marry and serve in the military. We issue Hunter three turds, one for each time DeMaio invoked his name to emphasize how “conservative” his constituency is. (We also award Hunter’s opponent, Ray Lutz, a Democrat, a carnation for showing up at the event and looking pretty darned sharp after his hunger strike.)
In contrast, we’ll send former San Diego City Councilmember and San Diego’s first lesbian (interim) mayor Toni Atkins a wreath to hang on her Assembly campaign office door, courtesy of District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis.
Dumanis, a Republican, is not endorsing in that race, but it speaks loads that she decided to publicly “introduce” Atkins at the event and not Ralph Denney, Atkins’ Republican opponent, who is also gay.
Nobody’s business
At public appearances across the district, San Diego City Council candidate Lorie Zapf has described herself as a small-business owner. In fact, she’s listed as a “businesswoman” on the ballot.
However, as we reported at sdcitybeat.com on Aug. 27, the candidate’s business, Zapf & Associates Inc., was officially dissolved months ago. Zapf’s campaign won’t tell us why, which is ironic considering that she’s campaigning on fiscal responsibility, accountability and common sense.
We’re issuing her a poo per day until she explains herself.
Bidding on eBay
Perhaps it should be no surprise that people who like to risk money on the Internet are optimistic about former eBay CEO Meg Whitman’s chances of winning the California governor’s race. What is surprising is how big they’re betting that she’s going to win.
The website Intrade.com allows users to invest in political races as if they were any other commodity future, such as oil or pork bellies. In this case, speculators bet on whether they think a Republican, Democrat or Independent is going to win. The price of each share or “contract” is measured in points on a scale of 0 to 100, which means the going rate translates into the chance that candidate has of winning.
As of our deadline, Whitman’s stock was spiking, with investors paying 60 points for a Whitman contract and only 40 points for Democratic nominee Jerry Brown. Accordingly, we issue the Republican 20 blossoms to fill the margin.
Follow Turds & Blossoms on Twitter—@turdsblossoms—and send tips to davem@sdcitybeat.com.
You have to give it to San Diego’s gay leaders: They’re masters of innuendo, whether sexual or political.
Take, for example, City Councilmember Carl DeMaio. Told that he must stick to a strict time limit, he announced to the crowd: “Every night when I get home, Johnathan gives me the same rule: Two minutes.”
The audience tittered.
“Two minutes to talk politics!” DeMaio cried out, then tsk-tsked the audience for their dirty minds.
It wasn’t the smoothest joke, but it certainly felt liberating. While gay politicians might not be free to marry (DeMaio’s put a promise ring on the finger of Johnathan Hale, publisher of the San Diego Gay & Lesbian News, the event’s sponsor), they are freer than their straight counterparts to wink and nudge. They also have greater liberty to break from party ranks.
Now, while DeMaio didn’t actually violate Ronald Reagan’s 11th Commandment (“Thou shalt not speak ill of any fellow Republican”), he certainly intimated illness towards one particular Republican with whom his district overlaps. And DeMaio did not tsk-tsk the audience when it hissed biliously at the mention.
“Please suspend your disbelief and recognize that even in Duncan Hunter’s own congressional district you can have an openly gay leader,” DeMaio said of Hunter, who vocally opposes allowing gays to marry and serve in the military. We issue Hunter three turds, one for each time DeMaio invoked his name to emphasize how “conservative” his constituency is. (We also award Hunter’s opponent, Ray Lutz, a Democrat, a carnation for showing up at the event and looking pretty darned sharp after his hunger strike.)
In contrast, we’ll send former San Diego City Councilmember and San Diego’s first lesbian (interim) mayor Toni Atkins a wreath to hang on her Assembly campaign office door, courtesy of District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis.
Dumanis, a Republican, is not endorsing in that race, but it speaks loads that she decided to publicly “introduce” Atkins at the event and not Ralph Denney, Atkins’ Republican opponent, who is also gay.
Nobody’s business
At public appearances across the district, San Diego City Council candidate Lorie Zapf has described herself as a small-business owner. In fact, she’s listed as a “businesswoman” on the ballot.
However, as we reported at sdcitybeat.com on Aug. 27, the candidate’s business, Zapf & Associates Inc., was officially dissolved months ago. Zapf’s campaign won’t tell us why, which is ironic considering that she’s campaigning on fiscal responsibility, accountability and common sense.
We’re issuing her a poo per day until she explains herself.
Bidding on eBay
Perhaps it should be no surprise that people who like to risk money on the Internet are optimistic about former eBay CEO Meg Whitman’s chances of winning the California governor’s race. What is surprising is how big they’re betting that she’s going to win.
The website Intrade.com allows users to invest in political races as if they were any other commodity future, such as oil or pork bellies. In this case, speculators bet on whether they think a Republican, Democrat or Independent is going to win. The price of each share or “contract” is measured in points on a scale of 0 to 100, which means the going rate translates into the chance that candidate has of winning.
As of our deadline, Whitman’s stock was spiking, with investors paying 60 points for a Whitman contract and only 40 points for Democratic nominee Jerry Brown. Accordingly, we issue the Republican 20 blossoms to fill the margin.
Follow Turds & Blossoms on Twitter—@turdsblossoms—and send tips to davem@sdcitybeat.com.
