Education of the Modern Doctor: Marcus Welby vs. House 
I’ve been hoping against hope that some enterprising local theater company will mount the stage adaptation of Nathaniel Hawthorne’s The Scarlet Letter so’s I can use that headline on a review. The 1850 novel centers on Hester Prynne, who’s been tsk-tsking with somebody not her husband. As part of her public shaming, she has to wear a big red ‘A’ (for “adulterer”) across her chest. She’s probably thinking exactly what the headline says—now, there’s some up-close-and-personal reportage!
Until opening night, I’ll have to content myself with pointing you to the ‘A’ wine series from Acacia Winery, in the Carneros region of Napa Valley. The 2008 A by Acacia Chardonnay is a standout among standouts—the vintners’ choices of fruit flavors (which can run the gamut in a good Chardonnay, since the grape itself is relatively inert) are lusty and settled, evoking sensations of oak and melon. The aftertaste, which lasts precisely a month and a half, will goad you toward milder pairings; salad and tamer white fish, like shark, go well with this. This one’s flavor is so big that it can be pretty satisfying by itself—in that case, I like it over ice. That’s a sacrilege among purists, I know, but I’m rarely concerned with what people think; don’t forget, I’m also the guy who freaks over cottage cheese and ketchup. Bologna and peanut butter’s good, too.
Maybe our pal Hester was under the influence of wine when she—uh—strayed into another man’s nether regions. If everything else had been equal, she could have scored a bottle of A by Acacia Chard for less than $20 at BevMo and elsewhere, then gone on to have her way with her paramour. That big red A would still be a fuckin’ pain in the ass, but the memory of this namesake wine, and some great sex on top of it all (pun intended), might just well have softened the fuckin’ blow.
