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Plane speaking: The first clue that you’re about to see a farce lies in the set, specifically the number of doors for the cast to slam and dart between. The Old Globe Theatre’s current Boeing-Boeing has eight of the suckers, and they get plenty of use, but they’re apparently rigged to close rather gently. By exactly the same token, this show has little impact of its own—it’s a tired old saw about Bernard (Rob Breckenridge), an American businessman in Paris who’s having trouble juggling affairs with three female flight attendants. Director Mark Schneider’s stage pictures grow stale on a dime, and Rob Howell’s scene design is way too big for the action that takes place. Joseph Urla’s good turn as an unwitting party-crasher is helpful, but it’s mostly lost in this bloated Mark Camoletti and Beverly Cross piece, which runs through April 18 at the Globe’s mainstage, 1363 Old Globe Way in Balboa Park. $29-$59. www.oldglobe.org.
Opening
Alive and Well: A big-city reporter from the North gets more than she bargained for as she researches a story about a Civil War freak from the South. Now in previews, it opens March 25 at the Old Globe’s Sheryl and Harvey White Theatre, 1363 Old Globe Way in Balboa Park. $29-$58. www.oldglobe.org.
Legally Blonde, the Musical: After her boyfriend dumps her, Elle Woods winds up at Harvard law, which proves to be no solution. Produced by Broadway / San Diego, it opens March 30 at the Civic Theatre, 1100 Third Ave., Downtown. $18-$79. www.broadwaysd.com.
Speech and Debate: Three teens discover they’re linked by a sex scandal that’s rocked their sleepy Oregon town. In previews March 25, opens March 27 at Diversionary Theatre, 4545 Park Blvd. in University Heights. $29-$33. www.diversionary.org.
Sweeney Todd, the Demon Barber of Fleet Street: Murderous barber Todd and a quirky proprietor combine efforts to prepare some meaty delicacies. Produced by Cygnet Theatre Company, it’s currently in previews and opens March 27 at Old Town Theatre, 4040 Twiggs St. in Old Town. $17-$27. www.cygnettheatre.com.
Now Playing
An Evening with Pablo Picasso: Culture Clash’s Herbert Siguenza takes us on a journey with the first rock-star artist. Through April 11 at The Lyceum Space, 79 Horton Plaza, Downtown. $29-$34. www.sdrep.org.
Elliott, a Soldier’s Fugue: Three generations of a Puerto Rican family recount the horrors of their U.S. military service. Produced by Ion Theatre Company, it runs in repertory with the thriller Back of the Throat through April 10 at BLK BOX @ 6th and Penn, 3704 Sixth Ave. in Hillcrest. $20-$24. www.iontheatre.com.
Fighting Words: Blood money, obsession, the disco era and Pablo Picasso color this series of five staged readings. Through March 28 at MOXIE Theatre, 6663 El Cajon Blvd. in the College Area. $10-$15. www.moxietheatre.com.
* Pump Boys and Dinettes: Rhetta and Prudie serve up family fare and the latest gossip at the Double Cupp Diner. Produced by Lamb’s Players Theatre, it runs through April 25 at The Horton Grand Theatre, 444 Fourth Ave., Downtown. $26-$48. www.lambsplayers.org.
Romeo and Juliet: Two love-struck Italian kids off themselves amid their families’ squabbles. Produced by Poor Players Theatre Company, it runs through April 4 at Swedenborg Hall, 1531 Tyler St. in University Heights. $20. www.poorplayers.com.
Triple Espresso: Three friends go for their big break as a comedy trio and run into failure after failure. Through April 11 at The Lyceum, 79 Horton Plaza, Downtown. $25-$39. www.tripleespresso.com.



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